The Dalek Bites Back

The Daleks have changed their tactics. No longer do they approach the unlucky, mechanically screaming, "Exterminate, exterminate!" No longer do they approach the unlucky with their ray guns flashing green rays thus turning the victim into a flashing and rapidly disappearing black skeleton.

Today they seduce their victims with more gentle approach. "Just come and lie on this table." "You won't feel a thing." "It will all be over in 40 seconds." The result is compelling and encourages a sense of confidence and assuredness. Don't be deceived. They still aim to fill your mouth with hot tar and then to give you 'Exterminate' nightmares every night.

I was told that for the first two weeks I'd notice very little. My skin might redden a bit, my neck might get a bit stiff and so on. Then, suddenly things might get worse. They were right! Last Friday I was OK. I went out for an Indian with my mouth feeling a little tight and a hint of soreness. To be frank I did fall asleep in front of the TV when we got home - but there's nothing new in that.

At this point those of you of nervous or fragile disposition had better look away as I don't want to send you off looking for a bucket to be ill in!

This weekend my mouth is ulcerated and blistered, my tongue is ulcerated and bleeding. Every time I talk the ulcers on my tongue rub against my teeth so I am reduced to communicating in grunts - one grunt for yes, two for no and gestures for everything else. I can't eat because of the ulcers. Even soup is difficult as I can't deal with even tiny lumps of meat or vegetable. Fortunately I can still swallow so I am still able to drink my complete diet drinks to make sure my nutrition is kept up. Eventually I may have to resort to injecting the feeds down the tube and straight into my stomach but for now I am still able to enjoy the delights of milkshake-like drinks in vanilla, banana, chocolate, toffee, strawberry, orange and tropical fruit flavours.

The only thing that keeps me going is my bottle of Codine Phosphate syrup. Until Thursday I was struggling on with Paracetamol and Ibuprofen. They helped for a day or two but I was really suffering. Fortunately the Dalek and his slaves are really clued up as to how their zapping might effect the unlucky. I only had to say that I was finding it difficult to cope to get moved up the drugs hierarchy. So although I still have ulcers and blisters. Although my lips are cracked and bleeding, although my neck is so swollen that I can't look over my shoulder, I'm not feeling too uncomfortable or too unhappy. After all, once tomorrow's treatment is done there will only be one Monday left! Some of the slaves have even tried to be encouraging by suggesting I might reach a plateau and things will stop getting worse. My cynical side says its just going to get worse and worse right to the end. Well we'll see.

Thanks to all of you who have offered thoughts, prayers, support, comfort and friendship. I can't tell you how much it has helped me and helped Elaine and lifted our spirits. Just a little way to go now and it might, just, all be over.

Ron