Where to start??!!
Well, to deflect any concerns, there is no awful news to report. Difficulties and concerns yes, bad news no. So let's begin.
I am very much in a 'wait and see' stage. Cancer remains so hidden that the docs don't know whether I have it any more of whether it's all gone. Apparently just one missed cancer cell could be enough to start a new malignancy. Because they can't see and so don't know, treatment can be aggressive - very aggressive - as mine was. So now we are just waiting to see. One doctor told me that if nothing came back within 12 months I stood a good chance of having got rid of it, another suggested two years. At the moment every sore spot in my mouth, every lump and bump on my face or neck is a source of concern or alarm for Ellie and me but all have been dismissed by the docs who tell me how well I am and what good progress I am making. Occasionally my cynical side gets the better of me but life is too short to spend large sections of it worrying.
Now here's something they don't tell you in the financial planning books -retirement can be really expensive! We've had the chance to do all sorts of things we didn't do so much before. The kitchen refurbishment is half way through but we've ground to a stop through the need to re-think the finances.
We go out mid-week, visiting, shopping, walking, exploring. It all needs diesel and food and that mounts up.
We get to the stage where we feel as though we ought to be able to spoil ourselves - so we do.
We are almost living as though there'll be no tomorrow (perhaps there won't!). We've been on two holidays in the last month. To Madeira at the end of March and to the Lake District in the middle of April. Much appreciated and sorely needed, these put us back on a route to normality and saw us doing many of the activities we have enjoyed in the past - walking, taking photographs, exploring. The Lake District trip was our second house exchange, this time a non-concurrent one. The house was stayed in was beautiful. An end terrace house in a quiet country spot just out of Kendal. The owners are self employed and at least one of them is a property developer and house and garden designer. You may imagine that the house was lovely. It was also minimalist, totally uncluttered and beautifully organised. Everything had it's place and there was nothing superfluous. They are going to find Blackberry Cottage quite different when they come here this week to go to the Spring Garden Show at Malvern.
We were lucky with the weather on both holidays. Madeira was fine, not too hot, not too much strong sunlight - my 'delicate' skin can no longer be exposed to too much sunshine -(I feel a bit like a Victorian lady in the Raj!). Our last day was the reason we'd gone to Madeira that week - the high point of the flower festival - a parade of flower-decorated floats through the streets of Funchal. It was rained off with a vengeance, it didn't stop raining all day and apparently rained for the best part of the next week.
We were lucky in the Lakes as well. There was a strong, cold easterly wind. By the time we got towards the top of some of the lesser peaks - we didn't try any of the more demanding ones - the wind was thundering and standing up straight was a challenge. But it was dry, mostly and we did get a reasonable dose of sunshine.
If anyone wants to see my holidays snaps have a look here:
http://www.photobox.co.uk/album/29094330
http://www.photobox.co.uk/album/29093648
We have one more holiday arranged so far - another house exchange (and our first foreign one). We are exchanging with a couple from Marin County, California in October. Some of you will know that we have friends in central California so we'll be able to see them but also go off and explore parts of California we haven't seen before. En-route we'll spend a couple of days in California and then head for Calgary to go to Banff and on to see friends in British Columbia that we haven't seen for more that 12 years. Whilst we're in California we might take a side trip out to Las Vegas to go and see Cirque du Soleil. We've seen two of their shows already and been 'blown away' by the concept, the performance and the staging. Their shows are jaw-droppingly amazing and while the opportunity exists .....
As well as holidays we have been living it up in the cultural scene. The freedom of retirement means I no longer stop to ask myself whether I can go out mid week, so in the last couple of months we have been to:
Cirque du Soleil at the NIA. This was wonderful but SO different from the first show we saw it made us wonder what else they can do - the reason for our potential visit to Las Vegas.
The Vaughan-Williams 50th anniversary of his death, concert in Worcester Cathedral
A 'Shindig' drama production at Abberley Village Hall. It was a celebration of 'film-noire'. £12.50 for a three course meal and tickets to the show; incredible value. If you live in Worcestershire and you've not heard of Shindig (bringing live arts to your doorstep) get a booklet from your local library. There's a tremendous range of music, dance and drama and all really good value. We're off to another one tonight at Sinton Green. A John Godber play plus a meal for just £9 a ticket - you can't beat it.
The Australian Pink Floyd - a sensational tribute band with the lights, inflatable animals, cartoons, light show and volume of the originals. They were top notch musicians too. They were really good, even the bit of tongue that was stuck in their teeth. Virtually all the band shared the same name - Bruce, apart from the girls who were Sheila and the keyboard player, Rolf.
The following night (bad planning I think - guess who arranged it!) we went to the Huntingdon Hall in Worcester to see a Canadian Folk-Rock band called Tanglefoot. They were really good too. We'd never seen them before and I fancied trying something new.
Still to come, a Rolling Stones tribute band - the Counterfeit Stones and then Mark Knopffler (Dire Straits) live and real at the NEC. On midsummer's day were off to Symphony Hall to listed to Vaughan-Williams' Sea Symphony. And that, as they say, is that, for now at least.
As you can tell, thoughts of cancer have faded for now at least. The after-effects of the radio-therapy are still with me and are very slowly intensifying. It is such a slow, insidious process that really it's impossible to judge how things are changing. My neck and shoulder tissues get really stiff and I have to spend 5-10 minutes every morning and at odd-times during the day doing stretching exercises. The same is true of my mouth which is slowly tightening up and which also demands daily exercises. None of this is painful, at worst I can say it is uncomfortable but I can live with ( and most often forget) it. I am getting a little bit of NHS physiotherapy to stretch and ease the muscles in my neck and shoulder and this is helping to maintain as much movement as possible. I can work, garden, decorate, drive and do all the normal jobs I want to do but I do get some cramp in my left arm from time to time. The annoying thing is that I had none of these problems when I finished the radio-therapy, they have all built up since the treatment finished. As for the future, well I'll continue to have regular 4 to 6 weekly check-ups for now and some doctors tell me it will ease over time as the scar tissue softens up.
And now, a possible date for your diaries. This autumn sees several reasons for celebration. I'll have survived one year from my treatment, We'll have got through our first year of retirement without murdering each other and my 60th birthday will be rapidly approaching. So I'm in the first stages of planning a grand celebration on Saturday 30th August. It will probably be here at Blackberry Cottage and is likely to be an afternoon and evening affair. More details and invites will follow when we've had the time to think plans through, approach the neighbours and speak to the Parish Council about using the common. (I hope they might allow a corner for camping and parking.) If you think you'd like to come do let me know so I can get a rough idea of how many to plan for. For my ex-colleagues, look at it as a final fling before settling down to another term of hard slog.
Well, that's all for now. Stay smiling, keep looking forward and the worst will be behind you!
Hope to see or hear from you soon.
